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About This Author
I am SoCalScribe. This is my InkSpot.
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Blogocentric Formulations
Logocentric (adj). Regarding words and language as a fundamental expression of an external reality (especially applied as a negative term to traditional Western thought by postmodernist critics).
Sometimes I just write whatever I feel like. Other times I respond to prompts, many taken from the following places:
Thanks for stopping by! 
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PROMPT: Photo albums. On the first day (yesterday), tell us all about your experience with photo albums (physical or electronic). Do you still have pictures from when you or your children were young? Did your mother ever bring out your baby photo album at an inopportune/embarrassing moment (family reunion, boyfriend/girlfriend visiting, etc.)? Feel free to share some pictures with us if you want to Bigsmile On the second day (today), let us in on your future photo album plans. Any big trips coming up you hope to document? What is your motivation for recording these important events if there is potential they will only sit in their albums on a shelf for most of their life until they are removed, leafed through, and winced at? As a follow-up question: do you think that hiding behind a camera lens removes the photographer from the experience taking place in front of them?
I honestly don't have any future photo album plans. I'm taking a trip to New York in a couple of weeks for work, and it just happens to coincide with spring break for my wife's school, so she's going to tag along and we're going to have a week in the city together. Then, in July, we're both taking a trip to Brazil for a few weeks. While we're excited about both trips and I'm sure there will be plenty of photos taken, I don't think I'll be making a conscious effort to compile photo albums to share with people. As the prompt itself mentioned, photo have great potential to "only sit in their albums on a shelf for most of their life." I've also been on both sides of a photo presentation where I've showed people hundreds upon hundreds of vacation photos and found them fascinating... as well as been a viewer of someone else's hundreds upon hundreds of vacation photos and found it tedious and dull.
The truth is, I often hide behind the camera because I don't like being in front of it. Being the photographer does remove one from the experience taking place in front of them, and it's tempting for me to fill that role, standing aside as an observer rather than being a participant. I've also found this to be the case as a filmmaker, both for narrative short films like the ones I worked on in film school, and for documentary-style projects like the few wedding videos I've made. There's something safe and secure about being removed from the action and always able to keep everything at arm's length.
What I've started to realize, though, is that I don't really want to be behind the scenes and removed from the action. I don't really want to be in front of a camera, either, though. Documenting an experience is far less important to me than actually living it, so I tend not to take too many photos when my family and I are on vacation. There are the obligatory photos for the Facebook wall and to send to family saying, "Wish you were here," and I have no problem with those few photos... but I really have an issue when a vacation or an activity on a vacation is entirely consumed with making sure it's properly documented. In my relatively short life and relatively few travels, I've seen a sunset from the top of a Hawaiian volcano above the cloud layer, wandered through a 12th-century Spanish castle, traversed the creepy tunnels of the Catacombs of Paris, been to the top of the Eiffel Tower and Empire State Building, and taken a hot-air balloon ride over the vineyards and orchards of California. During some of these excursions I've meticulously documented the experience, while others I spent time living in the moment and simply enjoying the experience. What I've come to realize is that, after the initial rush of the vacation is over, I've never once wished I had taken more pictures and spent more time documenting the experience, but I have wished that I had taken more time to enjoy the experience while I was there.
It's not just vacations, either. I have friends who will not start eating their meal until they've snapped a photo with their smartphone and uploaded it to Instagram or Twitter or Pinterest or Facebook. I have family members who want to spend half a day away from everyone else at a reunion so they can take a certain picture of a certain location at a certain time of day. I have coworkers who attend our movie premieres and awards season parties and spend more time worrying about how they look, whether they can get a picture with someone famous, or if they'll show up in a photo in the trades the next day, than they do enjoying the accomplishment of the movies we've made or the awards we've won. To me, it seems like a rather sad existence to spend more time worrying about how your life is documented and what others think of it than you do worrying about what you're doing and whether or not you're enjoying yourself.
There will always be an important place for photographs and their sharing with others. It's amazing that we're able to capture a moment in time and preserve it forever. But I think our society is moving in a dangerous direction where we're more concerned about the posterity of it all than we are with what we do in the moment. And that's the real problem... when the experience itself is secondary to the recording of it.
Personally, I'd rather have the more vivid memories that come with experiencing something than having more documentary evidence that I was physically there. I'd rather remember the things I've done rather than the photo ops I've captured.
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PROMPT: Pick any television show you want (that you haven't already used) and explain why you picked it/why we should watch it.
I'm writing about BREAKING BAD today because it's one of the most popular shows I haven't seen. Technically, I've seen a couple episodes, but not even half a season of a show that, by all accounts, is spectacular. I mean, the way Twitter blew up every time a new episode came on, the way coworkers breathlessly asked each other if they had seen what happened on the show the night before... the fervor and excitement over this show easily matched - if not exceeded - the hype and excitement of any other series I've seen, including shows like LOST and ALIAS. I mean, everybody loved this show, even other actors, writers, and producers.
I mean, seriously, Bryan Cranston received a fan letter from Anthony freakin' Hopkins! Here it is, if you've never read it:
Dear Mister Cranston.
I wanted to write you this email – so I am contacting you through Jeremy Barber – I take it we are both represented by UTA . Great agency.
I’ve just finished a marathon of watching “BREAKING BAD” – from episode one of the First Season – to the last eight episodes of the Sixth Season. (I downloaded the last season on AMAZON) A total of two weeks (addictive) viewing.
I have never watched anything like it. Brilliant!
Your performance as Walter White was the best acting I have seen – ever.
I know there is so much smoke blowing and sickening bullshit in this business, and I’ve sort of lost belief in anything really.
But this work of yours is spectacular – absolutely stunning. What is extraordinary, is the sheer power of everyone in the entire production. What was it? Five or six years in the making? How the producers (yourself being one of them), the writers, directors, cinematographers…. every department – casting etc. managed to keep the discipline and control from beginning to the end is (that over used word) awesome.
From what started as a black comedy, descended into a labyrinth of blood, destruction and hell. It was like a great Jacobean, Shakespearian or Greek Tragedy.
If you ever get a chance to – would you pass on my admiration to everyone – Anna Gunn, Dean Norris, Aaron Paul, Betsy Brandt, R.J. Mitte, Bob Odenkirk, Jonathan Banks, Steven Michael Quezada – everyone – everyone gave master classes of performance … The list is endless.
Thank you. That kind of work/artistry is rare, and when, once in a while, it occurs, as in this epic work, it restores confidence.
You and all the cast are the best actors I’ve ever seen.
That may sound like a good lung full of smoke blowing. But it is not. It’s almost midnight out here in Malibu, and I felt compelled to write this email.
Congratulations and my deepest respect. You are truly a great, great actor.
Best regards
Tony Hopkins.
I mean, wow. Anthony Hopkins, one of the most acclaimed, brilliant, and talented actors alive is telling Bryan Cranston that his portrayal of Walter White is the best acting he's ever seen; enough to make him binge-watch a show!  If that's not a ringing endorsement of a show, I don't know what is! 
The main reason I haven't watched the show yet is because I don't have a whole lot of time at home alone, and my wife isn't a huge fan of the concept. As a teacher herself, she's not particularly keen on a concept where a struggling teacher decides to cook meth on the side to make extra money, and I can't say that I really blame her. I know this is a dark show and it's not meant to be a happy-happy, uplifting type of story which are the kinds she usually prefers. But I've started watching shows in bed as she goes to sleep. The series (or at least the majority of the seasons) are available on Netflix, so instead of reading in bed I've been getting caught up on shows that she doesn't want to see that I've really been meaning to get around to. I just got caught up on HOUSE OF LIES, and now I think I'm going to rip through BREAKING BAD and then maybe tackle GAME OF THRONES. There's just so much good television out there, it's hard to keep up with it all!
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PROMPT: Photo albums. On the first day (today), tell us all about your experience with photo albums (physical or electronic). Do you still have pictures from when you or your children were young? Did your mother ever bring out your baby photo album at an inopportune/embarrassing moment (family reunion, boyfriend/girlfriend visiting, etc.)? Feel free to share some pictures with us if you want to Bigsmile On the second day (tomorrow), let us in on your future photo album plans. Any big trips coming up you hope to document? What is your motivation for recording these important events if there is potential they will only sit in their albums on a shelf for most of their life until they are removed, leafed through, and winced at? As a follow-up question: do you think that hiding behind a camera lens removes the photographer from the experience taking place in front of them?
My family has never really been one for taking lots of photos. We have quite a few albums from when my brother and I were younger (infants through the age of five or six), but not a whole lot after that... just a smattering of photographs here and there from important moments like graduations and first days of school and awards ceremonies of one type or another. My parents never really brought out the albums and showed the pictures at embarrassing moments, although there are a few embarrassing pictures in the albums that I've showed people myself. If you look at our family photos over the years, you can probably fit an entire trip on one or two rolls of film. There are a couple shots here and there, then one or two staged family shots of everyone who attended... and that's about it.
When my wife and I first started traveling on our own, I took a lot of pictures. Part of it was the advent of the digital camera and that fact that I could take literally hundreds of pictures without having to pay to have them developed, and part of it, I think, was to get a change from my parents' habit of not really capturing much of anything for the sake of posterity. We only went on a couple of trips like that, though, where I'd come home with hundreds and hundreds of photographs of architecture and scenery that I thought were important or memorable while I was there. I've largely stopped doing that, though; it's rare for me to go on a trip and come home with more than a hundred photos, even when I'm going somewhere exciting that I've never been before.
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PROMPT: What comedy movie makes you laugh the hardest?
GET SHORTY is a movie I never get tired of, and I always find myself cracking up at the same lines, time after time. It's one of my favorite Elmore Leonard novels, and I think Scott Frank (screenwriter) and Barry Sonnenfeld (director) did a masterful job capturing the sarcastic wit and cleverness of the story and characters. Every time I watch this movie I also get something new out of it, whether it's innuendo in a line that I didn't catch before, or a particular mannerism or bit of physical comedy from a character that I had forgotten about.
I'm a fan of all kinds of different comedies, but GET SHORTY does a great job of combining a lot of the elements that I love most, especially witty banter, recurring jokes, and deadpan humor. It's also got one of the greatest comedy ensembles I've ever seen with John Travolta, Rene Russo, Gene Hackman, Danny DeVito, James Gandolfini, Delroy Lindo, Dennis Farina, David Paymer, and Miguel Sandoval all playing prominent and memorable roles in the movie.
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PROMPT: Your worst DIY disaster(s).
The worst DIY disaster I've been a part of - by far - is when my grandparents first bought a house when they moved back to Northern California. This was more than a decade ago at this point, but they had retired to Montana a number of years ago and then moved back to the Sacramento area once they got to a point where they needed help taking care of a house. After they bought the house and we had started helping clean up and landscape the place, we realized that the lawn in the backyard wasn't faring so well because it was a thin layer of soil over the top of a filled-in swimming pool. Since the swimming pool had never been removed, no roots ever took under the soil since there was concrete about two inches under the surface. My grandparents decided to take the swimming pool out entirely, and the whole family came out to help them remove it.
During the course of breaking up the concrete footprint of the pool, carting it out of the backyard, and filling the hole in with real soil, assorted family members suffered the following various injuries: concrete fragment in the eye, concrete block dropped on the foot, several pulled muscles, a pick axe to the foot, a hammer to the hand, and - worst of all - a concrete chip that lodged in an uncle's finger until the nail, which nail had to be removed so the hospital could surgically remove the concrete. By the end of the whole ordeal, over half the family was nursing some kind of soreness or injury.  We began to think that pool was covered in the first place because it was cursed!
Ultimately, we did successfully remove the pool and get a lawn and other landscaping installed, so I suppose, disaster or not, it was an overall success.
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PROMPT: What upcoming show or movie are you most eagerly anticipating and why?
There are a ton of movies I'm looking forward to this year, even a few sequels which I usually don't enjoy. HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON 2 is exciting because I absolutely loved the first one, and 22 JUMP STREET is near the top of my list because the original - almost inexplicably - ended up being incredibly funny and even a little smart. Plus there's the obligatory superhero movies that I can't wait for (X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST and THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2), and a few other assorted projects (NEIGHBORS, JUPITER ASCENDING, SIN CITY 2: A DAME TO KILL FOR, GONE GIRL, etc.). But there's usually a specific reason why I'm looking forward to a particular movie, and it's rare that there's a project that I'm generally looking forward to for a variety of reasons. The last one was DIVERGENT (which I actually saw tonight), and it just so happens that the next one is a Shailene Woodley project as well: THE FAULT IN OUR STARS.
Here's the trailer:
And here's a small list of reasons why I think this is going to be great:
 Starring Shailene Woodley (DIVERGENT, THE SPECTACULAR NOW, THE DESCENDANTS)
Written by Scott Neustadter & Michael Weber (500 DAYS OF SUMMER, THE SPECTACULAR NOW)
Based on a critically-acclaimed book by John Green
Directed by Josh Boone (STUCK IN LOVE)
This was one of my favorite books that I read last year, and I think Shailene Woodley is one of the most talented young actresses working today. I'm incredibly excited to see how they translate the story to the screen... and I don't have to wait very long because it's coming out in June! 
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March 27, 2014 at 11:45pm March 27, 2014 at 11:45pm
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PROMPT: What is your opinion on gun carry laws (concealed or not)? Is it legal to carry a weapon in your home state/country? Does it make you feel more or less safe?
In California, I don't think you can get a conceal-carry permit unless you're law enforcement, but I'm honestly not sure about what is and is not allowed in terms of firearms. I'm not a fan of people being able to carry weapons around with them, and I've never had an inclination to do it myself, so I'm pretty uninformed when it comes to my Second Amendment rights.
In general, I'm against gun carry laws. Even though I personally would never want a gun in my home, I'm not against people owning firearms in the privacy of their own home, but I'm definitely against them being able to carry them around in public on their person. Since I was born and raised in California, I wasn't really raised in a culture that promotes the use of firearms, so I've never really developed a sense of security from the ownership of handing of them. And, to be honest, I'm not sure the added amount of "protection" that comes from people carrying around weapons offsets the vastly increased amount of risk that comes with carrying them. I've heard far more stories of people wounded and even killed by the accidental or improper use of firearms than I have stories where someone with a firearm was able to avert danger.
I have fired a gun before (my bachelor party was in Las Vegas, where extremely lax gun regulations allowed me to go to a range and fire a pistol, shotgun, assault rifle, and a submachine gun), and I totally get the sense of empowerment and confidence it can bring. So I don't hold it against anyone if they feel like having a gun in their house makes them safer. I disagree... but everyone's entitled to their own opinion. But for God's sake, keep it locked in a safe, and there's absolutely no reason why you would ever need a fully-automatic weapon unless you have cause to fear regular action-movie style attacks from dozens upon dozens of random thugs.
I guess what it really comes down to is that I recognize a gun as a very powerful, potentially very dangerous instrument... and I don't trust that everyone who owns one has the same philosophy on what constitutes safe use, or has been trained and observes proper gun safety at all times. And for those reasons, I don't feel safer knowing people are walking around in public armed. I feel less safe, especially in areas where conceal-carry is allowed and you have no way of knowing if the road-raging guy sitting next to you on the freeway is packing heat.
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PROMPT: Which character's departure from what television series was the most shocking to you? No last episodes allowed; we're talking important characters leaving and the show continuing on for at least a little while without them.
One of the most shocking, and most heartbreaking, character deaths I've seen was Rita during Season 4 of DEXTER. It wasn't like she was the first character the show had killed off or anything (it is a show about a serial killer, after all), but Rita was such a redemptive force in Dexter's life. Audiences thought that maybe, just maybe, Dexter had found someone who could make him want to be a better version of himself, someone who could save him from his own darkness. And just when we thought she was safe, that she had escaped from the danger of Trinity, the audience came to the awful realization that her cell phone was still in the house... and so was her body.
I think it's the only time my wife and I both screamed, "No!" out loud when Dexter went into the bathroom and found Rita's body... it wasn't just a surprising moment; it was a heartbreaking, soul-wrenching one as well. They not only killed off a major character, but one of the most beloved characters on the show as well. 
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PROMPT: Which animated character would you like to hear sing your favorite song?
Okay, whenever a prompt like this comes up, I don't immediately think of my favorite animated character and my favorite song; instead my brain starts thinking of bizarre combinations of elements that would be amusing to watch or hear. So for today's purposes, I'd like to hear Peter Cullen, voice of Transformers' Optimus Prime, sing the Sir Mix-A-Lot classic, "Baby Got Back." And just in case you're unfamiliar with either marvel of the modern world, here's Optimus Prime's voice:
And here's the song I'd want to hear him sing:
Admit it, you're totally picturing it now, aren't you? If I were trying to be clever, I would have picked a character like Elsa from FROZEN or Rapunzel from TANGLED because I know the actresses lending their vocals to the characters (Idina Menzel and Mandy Moore, respectively) would do a great rendition of whatever song I wanted to hear. But this seems like such an incredible opportunity, I don't just want a great singer who will sing something well... I want a memorable singer to do a version of a song that I'll never forget. And dragging Peter Cullen to a karaoke night somewhere would produce a pretty memorable result, I think, if I could get him to sing about liking big butts.
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PROMPT: What show or movie will you always watch when it comes on, no matter how many times you've seen it before?
This also happens to be the movie I saw the most times in a theater (tied at three with THE MATRIX). I've probably seen this movie fifty or a hundred times at this point, and my wife and I still sit down to watch it anytime we flip past it when channel surfing, or see it come up on a list of Netflix or Amazon recommendations. At this point we've both pretty much memorized almost all the lines - at least the good ones - from the movie and say them in sync with the actors on the screen. 
Here's the trailer:
For anyone who's unfamiliar with this movie, it's a modern-day retelling of Shakespeare's THE TAMING OF THE SHREW. Perhaps more importantly, though, Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Larisa Oleynik were billed as the stars of the movie (Gordon-Levitt had just been a regular on 3RD ROCK FROM THE SUN, and Oleynik was the star of THE SECRET WORLD OF ALEX MACK), but the two characters who really stole the show were the bitchy sister and the miscreant bad boy love interest... two actors who were relative unknowns at the time but became incredibly famous afterward: Julia Stiles and Heath Ledger. Those two stole every scene they were in, and it's tough to steal scenes from the likes of Larry Miller, Gabrielle Union, David Krumholtz, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Allison Janney! Although Janney was delightfully off-putting as the bizarre school guidance counselor, and Miller was exceptionally funny as Oleynik and Stiles' overprotective father.
If you haven't seen this movie yet, you really, really need to check it out. It's a very smart, very funny update of one of Shakespeare's most famous plays.
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PROMPT: What is one of your favorite tourist attractions from your hometown? In other words, what site do you absolutely insist your friends see when they visit?
"Tourist attractions" and my hometown aren't exactly synonymous. There isn't a whole lot to do where I'm from. Sacramento is a pretty decent-sized city, but it's not really known for much. There are a lot of bars and other nightlife, but there aren't a ton of family-friendly attractions worth checking. If you're a fan of state government, I guess the capitol is pretty cool, but I think the main attraction that I would recommend is the California State Fair, which is hosted at the fairgrounds in Sacramento every summer. There's also a water park on the grounds for a little extra fun, but I've always enjoyed the state fair - or at least some of it.
Since California is a largely rural state (outside the coast cities anyway), there's a lot of agriculture to be seen. And I've never been one to see a prized pig or an award-winning steer. But what the State Fair does have are three very cool features. The first is an exhibition of art and technology which is always impressive especially since a few of the exhibits are from school-age kids who have come up with some pretty amazing stuff. The second is the counties exhibit... kind of like a parade where each entity gets to design a float, each county is allocated a section of a large presentation hall that they can decorate however they want as a small walk-through exhibit featuring key aspects of their county. It's pretty impressive to see the displays that some counties come up with, and they always offer some kind of food or beverage that highlights their county, whether it's wine from the central valley, or avocados from a local farm. The top three winning counties are awarded a prize, and you can walk around and see the judges' comments on each of them. And lastly and most tastily, the fair offers a variety of deep fried foods, including one signature item every year. Featured items of the past have been Deep-Fried Twinkies, Deep-Fried Pop Tarts, Deep-Fried Mac & Cheese, Deep-Fried Cheeseburgers, and Deep-Fried Cinnamon-Rolls. They may have to wheel you off the fairgrounds on a gurney, but their featured items are always so good!
I think I became a little desensitized to the fair growing up... since we lived about 30 minutes from the fairgrounds, it was kind of a given that we would go every year, and after twenty years of attendance, some of the exhibits and attractions got a little old. But there are people who come from all over the state (and California is a big state!) to attend, and it really is kind of cool to check out if you're in the area during the couple weeks it runs every year. I wouldn't go so far as to say it's worth making a special trip up from Southern California to see... but if you're in NorCal over the summer, it's not a bad way to spend the day, especially if you've never been before.
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PROMPT: Did you ever watch a movie you weren't supposed to (like sneaking into a theater playing an R-rated movie when you're too young to buy a ticket yourself)? If so which one and how did you feel about it afterward? If not, were you ever tempted to?
This was the first R-rated movie I sneaked into a theater to see. Since I wasn't yet seventeen and able to buy myself a ticket, I bought a ticket for another movie at a theater where I knew security was lax, and slipped into the theater playing this one instead. Full disclosure: the movie came out a few weeks before I turned seventeen, so I technically could have waited and bought a ticket legitimately... but what's the fun in that??? 
This movie looked like a comedy and I liked almost all of the cast and had seen them in more family-friendly fare, so I couldn't figure out why this particular movie was rated R... and then they accidentally killed a prostitute in a rather graphic way not twenty minutes into the movie. .
I was never really one for sneaking into theaters to see movies that were above the rating level my parents would approve of. I was much more the type of person to sneak into theaters so I could see multiple movies in one day for the price of a single ticket.  Even then, though, that was only on rare occasions; I'm a pretty boring person who plays by the rules most of the time. If you tell me I'm too young to see a movie, I believe you. If you tell me not to go into the creepy cemetery at night, I won't go into the creepy cemetery at night.
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PROMPT: You're on a train (or other similarly isolated area) - how do you pass the time? Daydream...
I'm sure this isn't going to come as any big surprise... but I'd write. Being on a train or somewhere else that you're essentially stuck is the perfect place to write (and read) because you can't leave! I've always been pretty self-sufficient in terms of finding ways to entertain myself when I'm somewhere others might find boring... but that's always been because I have plenty to read and I usually bring a computer, pen and paper, or other means of jotting down ideas. As long as I can do those two things, I'm rarely, if ever, bored and the time seems to pass along just fine.
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PROMPT: Do you have a favorite screenwriter? BONUS: If you don't have one or know any (or even if you do), why do you think screenwriters aren't given as much prestige as actors, directors, and producers?
Terry Rossio and his writing partner Ted Elliott are responsible for the screenplays to quite a few movies that almost all of us have probably seen (including a few that have popped up on other bloggers' lists this month!), including ALADDIN, SHREK, and the PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN franchise. The reason I chose Terry instead of Ted is because he also writes the occasional column about screenwriting, which was an invaluable resource when I first got my start trying to write screenplays. These two guys are so smart when it comes to story and character, it's kinda ridiculous.
As far as why screenwriters don't get as much prestige as the actors, directors, and producers, I think it's because unlike, say, novels, the writer is the first voice in a very long process rather than the final voice. The writer is responsible for coming up with a script, but the producer is responsible for shepherding the project through the production process, the actors are the ones people see on the screen, and the director is the one who gets to put his "stamp" on it last by being responsible for the creative direction of the project during the leg of the journey between script and screen. Since the screenwriter's job is done largely behind the scenes, and primarily prior the the start of production, I think their profile on the project is lowered... and when you combine that with the fact that there are already so many other voices involved in a project besides the screenwriter, I think it's easy for screenwriters to get lost in the mix.
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March 24, 2014 at 10:07am March 24, 2014 at 10:07am
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PROMPT: Provide your thoughts/opinions on a newspaper/magazine article or a radio/television news story from the past week. And if you feel inclined, let loose and blog about your week. Also, feel free to comment on your favorite blog entries from your fellow challengers from the preceding week, though this is not required.
The story that stood out most prominently to me this week was "How to Poo on a Date"  winning an award for the oddest book title. I suppose what surprised me about this article was not that a book called "How to Poo on a Date" would win such a magnanimous honor... but that there's a prize for this kind of thing at all. I probably should have suspected, since there are awards for pretty much everything else.
What's particularly impressive (although it wasn't mentioned in the article; I had to do a little independent research) was that the Diagram Prize has been given out consistently (except for two years) since 1978! Some of the more memorable winners from years past:
 Goblinproofing One's Chicken Coop
How to Avoid Huge Ships
Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality
The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification
The Big Book of Lesbian Horse Stories
Greek Rural Postmen and Their Cancellation Numbers
The Book of Marmalade: Its Antecedents, Its History, and Its Role in the World Today
Proceedings of the Second International Workshop on Nude Mice
If there's one thing this list proves, it's that you can literally write a book about anything. It also proves, I think, that the person curating the list has an odd fascination with poop and farm animals, as eight of the thirty-four awards given out include something to do with one of those two subjects. 
I do have to admit, though, that now I'm tempted to read How to Avoid Huge Ships and Other Implausibly Titled Books and its follow-up, Baboon Metaphysics And More Implausibly Titled Books about the history of the prize and its nominees, including some apparent controversy where some of the titles were generated by computers and others where publishers began publishing intentionally bizarre titles to try and win the prize (which has no cash value, I might add). Like so many things, though, this is just bizarre enough to capture my attention and might result in me reading a book about it.
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PROMPT: What was one of your favorite cartoons as a kid? Or today... if you still watch cartoons today, you can totally talk about those too.
I used to be addicted to cartoons when I was a kid. I had a really difficult time choosing, and at various times during the writing of this blog entry nearly went with TRANSFORMERS, ANIMANIACS, G.I. JOE, GARGOYLES, DUCKTALES, TINY TOONS, BATMAN BEYOND, X-MEN, TOM & JERRY, LOONEY TUNES, VOLTRON, RUGRATS, DOUG, HE-MAN... okay, okay, I think you get the idea. So today I picked the cartoon that, for me, I think has the most elements that still appeal to me today. I love a good mysterious villain like Dr. Claw, secret gadgets like the one the Inspector has in spades, and I'm fascinated by stories of kids in roles that are typically reserved for adults. In fact, if you take a minute to think about it, the Inspector looking into cases while his daughter Penny is really the one who solves them has a lot of echoes in one of my other favorite TV shows off all time - VERONICA MARS - where Veronica works for her dad's private investigation firm and ends up being the one who solves an awful lot of mysteries that he only scratches the surface of.
Here's the classic intro to the cartoon series:
It's too bad they made this classic property into a... less classic pair of movies, but at least I'll always have the cartoon to remember it by.
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PROMPT: Let your mind wander back to the Middle Ages and imagine you are a scribe in the King's Court. Tell us about the goings-on in the castle (accents optional, but encouraged )
Pray pardon me, but if I do not get this written down, surely I will forget. At Her Highness' grand ball this evening, thou woulds't not believe the carousals that transpired! It was bad enough that Her Highness was reduced to being little more than a common tosspot thanks to reckless imbibing of fermented beverages, but to see that knave Sir Eldridge trying to take advantage of her... zounds what a scene! Mayhap Her Highness will realize the offense on the morrow and give Sir Eldridge a proper chiding!
Alas, but I wish that were all I had to pen tonight. But Sir Eldridge, after realizing Her Highness was not a conquest he woulds't be conquering last night, instead focused his affectionate attentions on the nearest maiden he could find. Alackaday! If only he had not been so tossed at to realize he was actually courting that wench Belinda! Prithee ye woulds't never know the depravity to which Belinda has been a party, suffices't to say that even a man of Sir Eldridge's stature would be wise to see past her nonpareil and evince that harlot for who she really is!
I do not sayest these accusations without merit; verily, I write them in faith that both Belinda and Sir Eldridge will be outed for the scoundrels that they are, and perchance finally be ejected from the social circles that would grant them access to Her Highness' esteemed company. Shoulds't they continued to attend, I cannot see'st how anyone of upstanding morals or reputation will be safe from their skulduggery!
This is why I don't go to renaissance faires. Well, there are lots of reasons why I don't go to renaissance faires, but my terrible use of their language conventions just makes it that much worse.
Hey, can we go back to that "embarrassing moment" blog prompt? I think I've got a new one... remember that time I tried to write a blog post in renfaire speak? (That was awful!)
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PROMPT: Who is your favorite director?
I had to award a tie to this one. I tried and I tried to pick one or the other, but I just couldn't. For me, Christopher Nolan and David Fincher are both directors at the top of their game. With the rare exception (ZODIAC in the case of Fincher and INSOMNIA in the case of Nolan), I have absolutely loved everything they've done, and even those two movies I mentioned were not bad. I just thought they were both slow and didn't move along as quickly as I wanted them to. But looking at their body of work, between them they've directed some of my favorite movies of all time. Fincher has done SE7EN and FIGHT CLUB, both excellent and the former of which is probably one of my favorite movies of all time, plus he's done the delightfully dark and compelling THE GAME, SOCIAL NETWORK, and the American remake of GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO. PANIC ROOM was also a great little thriller, and I can't wait to see what he does with the highly anticipated adaptation of Gillian Flynn's bestselling novel, GONE GIRL.
Nolan, on the other hand, managed to tell a story completely out of order through an unreliable narrator and have it make sense (MEMENTO), then went on to make one of the hands-down best superhero movie trilogies I've ever seen with BATMAN, and threw in an amazing movie about magic (THE PRESTIGE, also one of my all-time favorite movies), and the delightfully mind-bending INCEPTION. The concept behind his new movie, INTERSTELLAR, isn't necessarily blowing me away, but the fact that he wrote and directed it will have me buying a ticket on opening weekend for sure.
I suppose what it comes down to for me is that there are a lot of directors I really, really like, but quite a few of them have taken a number of missteps. Steven Spielberg, for example, has helmed more of my favorite movies than any other director, and stuff like E.T., JURASSIC PARK (sorry Diane  , I just can't quit those dinosaurs!), INDIANA JONES (the first three), SCHINDLER'S LIST, MINORITY REPORT, etc. are all excellent, he's also made movies that I just thought were misses like the fourth INDIANA JONES, MUNICH, and WAR OF THE WORLDS. Similarly, with Martin Scorsese, for every TAXI DRIVER there's a GANGS OF NEW YORK and for every THE DEPARTED there's an AVIATOR. Although both are excellent directors and I will forever be excited about the new projects they're working on, I look at them with a degree of skepticism. I still haven't seen either WAR HORSE or LINCOLN, and although I really want to see WOLF ON WALL STREET, I'm undecided on the upcoming SILENCE. Nolan and Fincher on the other hand, have each only had one movie that I would call simply "okay" rather than "great" and still come up with projects that I will 100% see right away because I'm eager to see their particular take on it. That's why these two are my favorite directors of the moment.
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PROMPT: Have you ever been embarrassed in public (and had people laugh at you)? And/or have you ever laughed at someone who had been publicly embarrassed? Tell us the story.
Unfortunately, I've been on both sides of the embarrassment.
For being embarrassed in public and having people laugh at me, the best example I can think of would be when I was in my World History class as a sophomore in high school. I had never been a very outspoken student (never raised my hand even when I was absolutely sure of the answer, only spoke when directly asked a question, etc.), and this one time I decided I was going to actually volunteer an answer because I had it down cold. It was one of those long response kind of questions like, "What were the factors that caused World War I" or something like that, and I raised my hand and went into a detailed explanation of each factor and supported it with plenty of examples. I was sure I nailed the answer and felt pretty good about myself.
Now, this is the point in the story where I should probably mention that my last name is the same as a certain Todd Bridges character from a certain sitcom called DIFF'RENT STROKES.
So the teacher, after I finish my thorough response, lets the class remain dead silent for about thirty seconds... then just when I'm starting to wonder if I screwed up the answer, shouts out, "What'chu talkin' 'bout, Willis?"
Cue the uproar from the class, especially when I tried to figure out if he was serious and stammered to try and clarify what I meant by my answer, so put on the spot that I didn't realize he was joking and thought he actually didn't understand what I just said. 
You know, now that I think about it, that teacher probably stunted my psychological development and is the reason I don't like to volunteer answers even to this day and even when I'm sure I know the right answer...
As far as being the one doing the laughing, I'm ashamed to admit that there are more times than I could probably count. Even though I was a pretty nice kid all things considered, teenagers aren't always the most sensitive people, and I was guilty most of the time of laughing when someone fell down, or when a kid was doing an impression to make fun of someone else. I have a very sarcastic sense of humor AND I laugh during uncomfortable moments to ease the tension, so that's not a great recipe when it comes to someone being embarrassed in public. I've laughed at quite a few moments that I wish I could go back and keep quiet about.
Having been on both sides of the embarrassment spectrum, all said, I'd rather be the recipient of ridicule and embarrassment than the source of or witness to it. The mortification that comes with being embarrassed, in my experience, endures for a far shorter period of time than the guilt of laughing at something you probably should't have.
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PROMPT: What's your favorite movie of 2014 so far?
Admittedly, I've only seen two 2014 movies so far: JACK RYAN and this one. So really, it's more of a "which of these two did you like better?" question and I'd give the edge to VERONICA MARS, although I enjoyed both movies. I got suckered in by all the callbacks to the series and the pop culture references, which edged it out over JACK RYAN even though both had very skillfully plotted narratives and kept me interested throughout.
I do say all of this with a caveat, though, which is that I don't think you'll get as much out of VERONICA MARS if you haven't seen the series. Yes, it works as a movie, but if you're walking into both movie worlds cold, I think you'll get more out of JACK RYAN because it requires a little less background knowledge to fully appreciate. VERONICA MARS is great if you're a fan of the show, but if you haven't seen any episodes of the series and aren't familiar with the characters, a lot of the best moments and funniest jokes of the movie will be lost on you.
For example, take this theatrical trailer for the movie:
Obviously some of the stuff is pretty easy to guess (that she had a relationship with Logan, that she wasn't the most popular kid in school, etc.), but there is a ton of stuff even in those two minutes and thirty seconds of the trailer that you can't truly appreciate without knowing the story behind the series. For example, the girl she punched out at the very end of the trailer is a very specific rival that she had through all three years of the series, and the stun gun she refers to is also a staple of the show. The frat guy's joke, "That girl who always follows you around is here" is also a nod to the series, as well as many of the cameos and characters that show up.
So I'd definitely call VERONICA MARS my favorite movie of 2014 so far, but that's only because I've seen all three seasons of the television series leading up to it.
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