For the anthology as a whole, I think you did a pretty good job with it. I definitely appreciate the ambition of trying to tell a set of stories featuring the same characters, which is an added level of difficulty on top of writing this volume of work and basing it on songs as prompts. Well done with that!
One global suggestion that I have for the collection is to perhaps try to connect the entries together more cohesively. I know that's difficult when you're specifically writing stories in response to a set order of the songs on a track list, but I did find the jumping around in the timeline to be a bit disorienting and confusing at times. I think something as simple as starting each entry with something like "TEN YEARS AGO" or "SIX MONTHS AGO" or "YESTERDAY" would go a long way toward helping your reader place the specific period of time each story occurs in as you jump around to follow your muse and fit the contest requirements.
In terms of the stories themselves, I think you really excel in the quiet, interpersonal moments. Every story you wrote that was focused on Dan and Reema (and Monica) and their relationship was strong and compelling. The stories that were more plot-focused on the cases being investigated is where you seemed to have a bit more difficulty maintaining the realism. With some additional research and revision, I think you could easily improve those areas of the pieces and make them significantly more compelling from a narrative standpoint, where they're not so reliant on expository dialogue and generic tropes.
Overall, though, I think this was a really ambitious Musicology Anthology entry and you did a really good job with it. Nice work!
 You responded to this review 09/13/2025 @ 3:53pm EDT |
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Review #4833216
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